Lucknow, December 23, 2011: Uttar Pradesh Chief Minister Mayawati ji has released a press statement citing her happiness at the shareholder wealth that would be created consequent to splitting Uttar Pradesh into four separate states. Drawing parallels with stock split on the stock markets, Mayawati ji mentioned in the statement, “It is our aim to create more shareholder wealth for all the parties involved. We, as responsible shareholders in the garb of politicians, are not aiming at petty political gains. We are just creating more shareholder wealth.”
It might be noted that splitting up Uttar Pradesh on the basis of regions – West, East Central and Wooded – the votes might be divided in favour of a certain ruling party in the state, for the upcoming Assembly Elections in the state.
When the mediapersons confronted the government official releasing the statement, he promptly called up the Chief Minster and conveyed the message back to the waiting gallery, “Madam ji is saying that the media and the Central government are against industries and shareholders in the state. She has categorically mentioned a certain Raajkumar being the person responsible for high crime rate in the state and the utter lack of infrastructure and industries in Uttam Pradesh.”
The response from Shree Digvijaya Singh ji, the complacent, was that the Uttar Pradesh Chief Minister is eyeing similar shareholder wealth created at the Centre, a beneficiary of which was Shree A ‘2G’ Raja ji. Shree Singh staked his party’s claim to the industry that governance is, by stating that they are the sole shareholders of this Central machinery and anyone who eyes their dividends would be dealt with severely. Our reporter overheard a few mediapersons discussing the falling out that Shree A ‘2G’ Raja ji had with Shree Singh regarding sharing of dividends and we all know what happened to Raja ji.
Panning the camera back to Lucknow, Mayawati ji has said that false reports of the citizens of the states being the real shareholders in the development of the state are being propagated by some sections of the media. She vent her ire on these un-named mediapersons by threatening them with creation of one of her parks bang opposite the erring scribes’ homes and offices to make them realize who the real daddy is.
The masses, on the other hand, had a jolly good day visiting the beautiful yet inexpensive monuments erected by the government of Mayawati ji in Lucknow and Noida. We spoke to one of the people present for a family’s day out and asked about his views on splitting the state into four.
He said, “This is a noble thought by Mayawati ji. Division ensures a better grip on functional and financial aspects of governing. New states also get special packages that, as is known, go to create even more shareholder wealth. We support this move and hope to see more such parks in every town of the new states.”